vergoldung: (ses cris se tirent dans les graves)
Flisties, hello.

I know I am the worst eljay person ever atm and at some point I will feel less appologetic about it, but for today once again : sorry.

So I am stuck in this train for hours, all my devices are dying and chargers are for cool people, ergo I am horrendously bored. Which I deal very badly with, seeing as I am usually running after time and not trying to pass it. Anyway. I've been thinking of trying a new thing, namely a drawing meme (or whatever that should be called, I like to call these things meme but I am not sure if that's the way to go, but also I don't care so drawing meme it is). The idea is that you prompt me something small/easy/simple/weird/creepy/gross/whatever to sketch and I'll do it for the date you pick. Now, I'm not sure yet what format I should use, because I usually find that having prompts+dates inspires me on the day I get them but not on the day I have to do them? And then it never gets done. Which id why I thought maybe it would be better to "pick a date" and then prompt on the day of the prompt or something. I don't know, I don't know, you guys.

But anyway. For today I'll keep it more simple and just do prompts right now. So those of you who are still alive around those parts, leave me a line and I'll post you the resulting sketchy sketch asap. (Please don't abandon me on this train ride of hell, thanks.)

In other words, this is me today :




ETA : so I only managed to do four today, but I will try my best to finish the other prompts tomorrow!!
vergoldung: (là)
Ok so seriously my internet situation is getting very annoying, so even if I now get occasional internet, I don't really feel like flisting, I'm sorry :(

BUT. The Heirs has taken over my life (SORRY FOR EVERYBODY WHO ISN'T WATCHING TBH. Y'ALL ARE MISSING OUT ON ALL OUR EPIC CONVOS.) and yesterday I was typing up "a few" of my ep 7/8 thoughts, because I didn't feel like making a post, but Lizzie was so kind and did one \o/. What I didn't expect was for my rambling to get so out of control omfg *facepalms*. So in the end, this reached such an embarrassing comment length that I decided to post half of it at Lizzie's and half of it as its own post.

And with those intro words I welcome you to the Tan/Eun Sang overanalysis post. Feel at home.

I'm crossposting two sections of the blabber I left at Lizzie's, because I feel like without them, the following will make less sense ; but for all the rest, you can find it (and everybody else's squee as well - because we are an active fandom yo!) at Lizzie's page if you wish, here. But it's very TL;DR so a brief summary of what you should know : Kim Won needs to be removed from my eyesight, Bona/Eunsang is the ultimate OTP and if you disagree then you are wrong and need to reconsider your life choices, other random shit (seriously, I have no idea how this even got so long).

Read more... )

Okkk... this has been disgustingly long, but it's over now!

Now, please put me out of my misery and discuss this with me. Or other things, whatever, as long as it's show related, come at meee!
vergoldung: (steady diet of soda pop and ritalin)
so, i've disappeared (again) for about a week and there are two reasons for this : 1) real life was decided on killing me until like wednesday. it was to the point that i actually slept at night and if you know me at all you'll know that this means trouble (basically i ended up waking up two hours earlier three days in a roy in the morning to finish the work i couldn't finish at night because i kept falling asleep, which might be because of the waking up at 5am hmm) 2) the same freaking day that real life decided to be nicer our internet connection at home decided to be the worst and just stopped working except for sporadic moments of short lived paradise. i thought it was finally fixed now but alas i was mislead by the paradise phase being a little longer that the usual. grrr.


so because i've been so fucking frustrated with being locked out of the interwebs i actually went to a cyber cafe today and loaded two eps of the heirs (5 and 6 ok i know i'm one week late ok I KNOW THANKS) anyway so i've written down stuff, more or less liveblogging. so heirs!people come tell me things, but remember no spoilers for the new eps pls :)


episode 5


• the fuchsia lipstick on everybody especially all the boyyys

• ship the infidelity ship so hard guh that was some hot making out

• young do is so motherfucking attractive it needs to stop - also does woo bin constantly look like a leopard on the hunt or what

• btw terrifying dog dnw a beast like in my house or anywhere near me actually

• the park mother continues to be the best character the end

• obsessed with park shin hye's bouncing ponytail, i want one too now this is a problem (don't make me want to cut my hair show gdi)

• the chairman's secretary(?) is perf, single dads who cook and have really hot infidelity wall-make-outs are my weakness apparently

• i cannot find it in me to care for won jfc that guy is such a bore and a douche at that, not here for him being a controlling dick with his friend who is also girl but hopefully not his girlfriend because eww talk about an anti-ship

• speaking of, a++++ to that woman's acting, the outrage on her face when he put the necklace around her neck was perf in the most upsetting ways - needs moar of her basically

• also my bb tutor boy i don't remember his name but i heart his face and at least he wasn't an ass with her (not that i ship it but at least their interactions are tolerable)

• enjoying the school pettiness so much atm

• seriously how tall is woo bin to be towering next to the lockers like that?

• bona and rachel are my bbs i do not even care haters to the left

• also very flaily about rachel/motorbike - get all the wind-in-hair action girl! team all the girls get scary motorbikes for christmas and start a bitchy biker girls' gang

• park shin hye's acting was excellent during that "tan reveals he is the second son" scene, i feel like the way the dialog went, this could have ended up being a completely different scene, if not for the way she was radiating anger/humiliation/defeat/bitterness - which made the entire scene for me because there was something very meta about her disillusionment versus tan's pathetically out-of-place "maybe i missed you" (dude r u srs)

• as a matter of fact, the otp is riding a thin line atm where they are a close to annoying me, but then the sappiness is stripped of meaning as soon as they remember where they are and who they are

• like i really enjoy this 'clinging to the vacation dream but oops real life sucks' narrative because i think it's very true to life actually? even though eun sang wasn't tan's biggest fan in america, she was still going to remember him fondly as this surreal encounter… the way you cherish vacation memories you know? they get to have that glossy finish once you look back (even though they weren't perfect, it's just nicer to nostalgically freeze them in time like that). except now it's not longer dreamed up fairytale but real life and so there is no way there won't be disillusionment. especially for eun sang (because tan is projecting way too much to be honest about things lbr he just wants things to be simple when they are not - which shows how spoiled he is - interestingly i think it's pretty obvious that part of him realizes that there is no chance that things will be simple and that he better man up, which i think is why he admitted that all of eun sang's accusations were true without excuses

• anyway i like this aspect of their dynamic a lot and i'm hoping the show is going to explore that nostalgic!longing versus the current!resentment some more and not sweep it all under the rug (but idt so, until now the show's actually been pretty good at showing how disparities in class and wealth fundamentally affect dynamics)

• lmfao what even was that ending except 300% ridiculous omfg still laughing can this show get any more in your face about the triangle like wow got it



episode 6

• grrr all the boys need to stop being the worst to my bb rachel :@

• having a really bad feeling about the mother in that outfit and the general deal of eun sang getting that school upgrade in the first place… i really hope i'm wrong :-/

• omfggggg forever lol at krystal's delivery of "i hate him so much but he's so hot" i had to pause i was laughing so hard

• i'm sure most people must be exasperated with eun sang's apathetic ways but tbh i'm quite on board with this. i'm really enjoying how at first sight she looks like a lost, depressive lamb, but then people get bossy with her and she legit just walks away because who cares about fighting with those brats l m a o

• also sorry not sorry but remember how she works more shifts than all of those business kids put together and she sleeps zero at night because top 5 student homework? idk i'd be over petty fights too js

• ok seriously minho's hair color needs to die i hate it so much even his fuchsia lips don't make up for it :@

• did i mention how i love that (despite her being super unaware of her surroundings all the time and looking like bambi) eun sang still gets to be very lucid about things? idk i really like that she doesn't have to be sharp 24/7 in order to be a survivor (plus looking harmless is a strategy like any other ok don't be so quick to look down on it and srsly who am i defending myself against when i haven't even discussed this with anybody yet)

• sobbing because of course it's not your fault umma :'( :'(

• lol @ those systematic gloomy-otp-sitting-with-a-wall-between-then-being-vvv-emo moments and wow tan is so fucking lame can he even get any lamer OMFG OFC HE CAN WOW DUDE NO BUT WOW CAN YOU BE A LITTLE LESS UPFRONT ABOUT HOW CREEPY YOU ARE? way to make yourself popular. (but i gotta say i like that the show doesn't seem inclined to have him be secretly creepy because that's not just pathetic, that's just truly creepy. i prefer the owned creepiness tbh.)

• omg crying tears of blood she is such a hipster with her earbuds and her unfashionable grey jumper in midst of all those preppy uniforms i caaaan't :')

[idk why lj fucks up the post starting from here but i want to cry bc i've edited this like 20 times without success and :'( the phone service is so bad here]

• nerdy boy nooooo crying that he said who cares about your conscience and then proceeded to shoo her away in order to get his daily bullying ;;;;;

• also daaang, you guys eun sang is a such survivor™ (psh's asking is so great alskdjaökj you can really tell that eun sang is used to switch from panic to survival mode bc real life is the worst and that's old news) i mean did you see how she instantly understood what was going on and how she did not waste a second to get out of there. lesson learned : who cares about your conscience, right? (except then ofc the conscience made a comeback because eun sang is still set on doing the Right Thing, so selfishly saving yourself is not high on that list. whatever i have hopes that she'll develop more ruthless coping skills idk ok being nice isn't always the better option.)

• yesssss "because it's what i have done" ok srsly digging tan's honesty about being The Worst so much. but seriously, lol forever at all the triangulation that's going on between young do and tan hft negl

• fuuuuuck woo bin in that leather jacket no no no no not fair not even the slightest bit fair

• ughhhh so over that dumb brother angst, like come on won what the fuck is your issue idgi

• tan's constant existential crisis is h i l a r yes dude there are folks who have to work for a living

• nooooooooooo NOOOOOOOOO NO NONONONONO I REFUSE NO NOPE NOPE THEY ARE NOT PLAYING JUST THE TWO OF US + MAKE OUT FLASHBACK NO THIS IS NOT HAPPENING LALALALALA (mothereff secretary yoon is so hot ugh ugh ugh)

• yaaaay my pretty faced bb getting screen time i hope that him and eun sang become friends!!!! qöqlkjdqölkjdöaqj I SHIP IT OK WHAT ARE THESE ADORABLE FACES THEY ARE MAKING TO EACH OTHER I CANNOT please let them form a secret alliance ok i need it ok faceeees ;;;;

• CRYING CRYING YOU GO NERDY BOY YOU GOOO BUT OMFG PLEASE RUN AND LEAVE THE COUNTRY BECAUSE THIS IS GOING TO END BADLY FOR YOU :(

• it's been to long since i last gushed about the perfection of psh's hair in this drama so let me remind y'all that this is a thing that is happening

• oh no you don't young do YOU DO NOT SAY CRAP LIKE THAT AND MAKE ME SHIP YOUR SHIP HOW DARE YOU :@ why am i falling for this protective shit so annoying i swear


so basically those are my feels (well some of them). brought to you without grammar or structure because be happy i'm even writing this down ok the internet has not been my friend these past few days okkkk


also i'm too impatient to wait for the return of the internet soooo i'm posting this from my phone aka the horror re: html formatting, so i can only hope this cut worked and yeah!! (srsly the lengths i am going to in order to post this, you have no idea like to even get this wall of text on my phone ok just pat me on the back a little)

((namhearts))




vergoldung: (c'est pour les analphabètes que j'écris)
Okay, don't freak out. This is not what is looks like. I don't actually want to leave everybody. And considering how much I love y'all, it's not like I can truly leave - not really.

However.

For some reason, various powers in the universe have decide that this needed to happen, so it's happening.
1. I'm still partially comment blocked and even though my anxiety has largely decreased since I went on unofficial eljay half-hiatus and radical tumblr hiatus (so I'm thinking 'tis the way to go).
2. Because it's summer time, I keep being interrupted in my internet time. This is both a good and a bad thing. (Good because socializing, yay. Bad because I'm super codependent and I miss you okay.) But it also means that I don't always have time to react to things (something that I still have an urge to do, even on half hiatus - yes, I fail at everything, including hiatus, go figure). Anyway, right now I have exactly five minutes of internet time before I'll be cut off for at least 24 hours and I'm thinking that instead of answering comments, I should make this post. (Also, these are the moments where I wish I had one of those intelligent phones that mean that you have internet everywhere, but alas nope.)
3. Starting this Sunday, I will be legit gone for about a week. Very probably without internet. So fake hiatus shall become real hiatus etc etc.

This being said.

Don't stop talking to meeee. I don't want to go away, I'm just trying a way to minimize my anxiety (because seriously, when fandom is causing you more social anxiety than real life, then something has gone wrong) until I can fix my messy brain and be less guilty-all-the-time. So my inbox is always welcoming and even if I happened not to check my flist, I'd see your message because yay email notifications. (Same goes for tumblr asks, btw.) If you want me to see something, tell me. Really, talk to me.


Other important note, directed to the Kpop alphabet : I have Zoe this close to watching Reply 1997. YES YOU HEARD ME RIGHT SHE IS CONSIDERING WATCHING IT. Now, we all know that she needs to watch it because her shipper soul is going to implode. Problem? It seems that all the streaming websites I knew of just collapsed yesterday or something. I am not amused. Basically, I need your help to me find a way for her to watch the show. (One person at a time, I will make this fandom a thing that exists okay. Don't let me down y'all!)


Last but not least, my ultimate queen just released a new single and the music video for it, and now I can die in peace because there is hope for us all. Nobody compares, I will never love any human as passionately, etc etc. Watch it and join the ranks.



(Her hair is down, her hair is down, her hair is dooown. I'm so cry.)
vergoldung: (mais chaque jour)
I finally made it home! Man, long day is long. Now, I just have to pack my suitcase and clean my room and then I can do an lj-night and get back to all of you :) I'm quite overwhelmed with how positive the responses to my last post were. It means a lot. *hugs everybody*

Okay, but before I leave again to be responsible and shit, LOOK AT WHAT MY SISTER DREW ME TODAY :

Photobucket

I cannot. Honestly. She drew me and the evil spider that stuns me. And I have a smile on my face and God. I just can't. It's so simple. HOW IS IT SO EFFING SIMPLE. Obviously my sister understands my fears better than I do... (Note to self : think about arachnophobia some more.)

But first : packing packing packing. Ugh.

I'll be baaaack!
vergoldung: (dans cette ombre)
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS OH MY GOD.

THIS. VIDEO.



Just.

HOW.

HOW DOES IT EXIST IN MY LIFE?
WHAT HAVE I DONE TO DESERVE THIS?




I am a teary mess of gross ~feelings. JUST. CANNOT. DEAL. AM ON THE FLOOR. SOBBING LIKE A CHILD.

MY FLAWLESS FLAWLESS BABES.
MY CREYYYYS.

GOD. THEY ARE FUCKING UNREAL IN THEIR UNFAIR PRETTINESS AND GLORIOUS ANGSTINESS AND GUILTINESS AND GODDAMN WRONGNESS. THIS COULD NOT BE ANY MORE PERFECT.

AND I AM UNWORTHY OF SUCH BEAUTY. BECAUSE HELP ME. THEIR FUCKING FACES. I CANNOT. REALLY. I HAVE NOTHING LEFT IN ME RIGHT NOW. EVERYTHING IS TEARS AND BLOOD.


FUCK FUCK FUCK. SO MANY SHIPPY FEELINGS RN.

Alaric/Elena? The ship that angsts because it exists. And still manages to be the most undramaticly functional combination ever... Because fuck them, they are the worst of all.

Ugh, so angry at Ric for being dead. WHY ARE YOU DEAD RIC? HOW VERY STUPID OF YOU. Worst. Guardian. Ever.


Seriously tho, I ship this so hard it's my #1 TVD ship. I kid you not. (Will mourn it forever.)
Random fact : they are featured in the top-ten-ships-ever post I started forver ago. Obviously it's still unfinished and I might never actually hit the 'post' button. But. I am having overhelming Elaric(?) feels tonight, so flail is happening tonight.

Ahem. Hear my woe.


This is not a shipper's manifesto. (I think.) It's not. )
vergoldung: (steady diet of soda pop and ritalin)
Hello again!

Who knew there'd come a time I'd post twice a day? But it's meme time (my first meme yay!) and since I don't know the meaning of the word 'concise' this morphed into it's own little post. Oh well...

I'm stealing this from[livejournal.com profile] fluffyfrolicker(who stole it herself, you know how these things work!), but I'll be doing the female version. Because girls are best ;)

Hence : Ten female characters I'd sleep with in a second



cue prettiness and flail )
vergoldung: (keep on dancing until the dawn)
HELLO WORLD, I COME TO CONQUER.


First : I am back and alive!!! Do you know what this means? HIATUS IS OFFICIALLY OVER! Yes, yes. Except that I am without internet, but still, it's over. Hellatus no more \o/ I will be back in my dearest suburbs in about ten days, so once I'm all settled we can all start an internet-war. Or, you know, be good kids and do positive thinking.


Second : I also have excellent news (this time, it's excellent!) : I finished in time :DD.

cue )
vergoldung: (change your clothes to tuxedos)


The ~shipping list.

I have actually done something similar a few months back. It ended up being way too analytical, and sadly word-overload (mercilessly) takes all the fun out of these things. (PIus, since I keep changing my mind about ships and love to pick up new (and even worse) combinations, I was constantly editing my thoughts or adding explanations. Really, that's too much work on the long run. So no eloquent justifications this time. I will however update this list once in a while. Probably. I'm rather predictable.)

So. Since I have a weak mind, fail at hiatus and I'm easily influenced by my flist, this is my new list. Yay.

The formating is pretty simple. I list the fandom, the five characters I'm most crazy about (and obviously, these aren't the only characters I love, but five is a neat number), and my ships. Which I didn't restrain to a number. Because really. How could I ever choose fairly? There are fandoms where I don't have that many ships, but most of the time, I have too many of 'em. And it feels weird cutting it down to five or ten ships when I actively read for about twenty combinations (and passionately ship about fourty because, yes, HP fandom ruined my soul). I know that I have forgotten ships. Hell, I've certainly forgotten fandoms! (But for now, this should do fine. Besides, editing ftw.)

I think the bolding and underlining speaks for itself*, as far as my shipping frenzy goes. Speaking of frenzy, I ended up selecting a top ten ships. So if the length of this list (understandably) scares you, here goes the condensed version. With pictures and flail!
[Um, I am still working on it. But it will happen. Soon. Otherwise, just yell at me.]

Oh. Also. I have a fondness for kink!porn and dark!ships. Doomed things are the light of my nights. There are cases where I strongly dislike the ship but love reading about it's awfulness. That is enough for it to make the list. Yes. Basically, this list holds all things that capture my fannish attention, good or bad. So as long as you don't assume that this is representative of my romantic aspirations, we're good. If you're curious to know in which way I ship a pairing, feel free to pester me with questions (outraged accusations work too). But just to be clear, my definition of shipping is pretty loose. Sometimes I want happily ever after, most of the time I just want boning, often I want abusive-not-ever-after, I frequently dig unrequited, and on rare occasions I just want good ol' platonical love.


*And the brackets work like this : I ship the pairing (not the threesome, even if I sometimes also ship the threesome) but with the looming presence of the third person. That can mean that there is unrequited love towards that third person (from one or both), that the third person is dead but remains a haunting presence (that could go as far as inducing unconscious identity mix-ups by one party), or that one of the two is additionally involved with the third person (for example because if the third person is the spouse). In any case, when formated like that I am not interested in the triangle per se, but in the resulting issues of that evil set-up for the ship in question. Making the presence or absence of this third person essential to the dynamic. (I think the ships in question should speak for themselves.)


Let's get wild. )
vergoldung: (read my book with the boring ending)







Yep, I'm leaving the cosiness of internet.

I need to focus on my project. Badly. And since I have a terrible attention span and get awefully easily distracted, I need to do something about the life-sucking force that is my computer. 

So, I'm thinking no computer/internet until I'm done with my work. (Lord, help me.) I'm hoping one month will do. Otherwise, you can start praying for my sanity! 


Be good while I'm gone :)




vergoldung: (and when the storm's gone?)



(The lovely lady pointing at you would be Choi Jinri, just fyi.)


You can call me Eléonore.
introduction things, I guess )

If you think we might get along, drop me a line.


My policy on f-locking?
Fannish posts and rants are unlocked. But I lock my art systematically and, sometimes, fic as well. And of course the recurring existential posts, ahem. Ships and fandoms for western shows are listed in this post.
vergoldung: (creux et plein d'ordure)

I knew the day would come. Here comes my first TVD related post. I guess that now makes me an active part of fandom? I don't know. It feels a bit weird to voice my thoughts to the cold void of the internet, but apparently, live-emoting about the episode with my baby sister isn't going to cut it for the finale.

So, TVD finale?

Gave me all the fucking feelings. All of them. 
Hysterical laughter. Juvenile squee. Blind rage. Shippy feelings. Utter disdain. Overwhelming love. My brain was screaming in sheer indignation and my heart was sore from all the emotional abuse.


cue to flailing and raging )

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